I don’t know about you, but I love eating foods with nuts in it and petting dogs whenever and wherever I get the chance, especially outside in the spring. Imagine yourself falling in love with someone who can’t enjoy any of these things! Don’t worry though, there are still plenty of fun activities for two people to do together.
However, it may be that this situation could become a deal breaker for you, but it doesn’t have to be! You may not be able to change the other person you are dating, but you can change how you feel about the situation. This is especially true if you love and respect the person you are dating and are willing to accept them for who they are. In turn, they may love you all the more for it. However, there are some things you need to discuss with your potential date in order for the relationship to begin.
Before Dating
The first thing you need to know is what exactly it is that they are allergic to. That part is easy, just ask. If they tell you first, even better, because that means that they want you to accept them and their allergy. Whether it is an allergy related to food, pet dander, pollen, or just about anything, there are things you should and should not do about each of these allergies. These allergies are listed according to how important they are when it comes to dating.
Food Allergies
Yes, unfortunately, some people are allergic to the foods you love, and no, you do not need to avoid the person you are dating just to enjoy the food you love. You simply need to be cautious on how you go about the situation. So what must be done?
Do’s
You must avoid the ingredient they are allergic to by eliminating all foods with that ingredient, even foods that are processed on equipment, such as machines, with the allergen.
You must remember to brush your teeth before any date, especially if you ate the ingredient they are allergic to. This is even more important if you want to kiss each other, which I’m sure you do because that is one of the reasons why you are dating them, is it not?
You must wash any dishes that your mouth was touching, especially your cup, so that any residue from the cup does not enter your mouth, thus making it likely that your mouth has the allergen in it.
If out for a meal, whether that meal is between the two of you or with family and friends, always request the meal to not have the food allergen in it. (Tip: You may even pack a meal if you are out with family and friends.)
Don’ts
Do not shame the other person for their food allergies, they may already feel bad as it is.
Do not, unless it was agreed upon, eat the food they are allergic to in front of them. Not only will it be hard for them to breathe due to the smell, but it will be harder for them to resist wanting the same food you are eating. This can lead to resentment of the other person.
Do not, under any circumstance, accidentally forget about this particular allergy.
Pet Allergy
This allergy is not as extreme as a food allergy, but it may be for those who are pet lovers.
Do’s
Do talk about how important pets are in the relationship before the relationship gets too serious, otherwise, resentment may build up. This is especially true if you already own a pet or are thinking about getting one.
Do avoid places that are extremely pet-friendly unless it is agreed upon.
Do try to consider hypoallergenic pets.
Do try to also consider having the person you are dating take a shot for pet allergies, although this may be an added cost on their health care bill.
Do consider appreciating plush animals if their allergy is too severe.
Don’ts
Don’t shame or resent the other person for this allergy, they may love pets just as much as you do, but cannot tolerate them as much as you can.
Don’t get too much animal hair on your clothes if you do pet an animal unless you decide to change clothes or take a shower.
Don’t show the person you are dating too many animal pictures or videos, as this may make them jealous.
Pollen Allergy
This allergy is most common in the springtime when everything is blooming, but it can also creep up year round depending on how much pollen is in the air.
Do’s
Do consider having your partner add honey to their food or tea. Since pollen is associated with bees, honey may help ease the allergy somewhat.
Do consider your partner getting as much fresh air as they can as soon as the weather gets warmer, since this may also help build tolerance of the pollen.
Do try to ask your partner to regularly take medication for the pollen allergy if it is severe.
Don’ts
Don’t allow your partner to avoid going outside or opening windows; they need the fresh air too!
Don’t move somewhere that has too high of a pollen count year round if your partner can’t handle it.
Don’t worry if your partner needs to escape the pollen at any time by going inside. There are plenty of activities that can be done both inside and outside.
These three allergies related to food, pet dander, and pollen, are the most common allergies, and they can be tolerated if you are serious about being with the other person.
You may not like how you need to change your lifestyle to better match theirs, but there are plenty of fun activities for two people that can be substituted for the ones you may still love.
If you still cannot tolerate having to change your lifestyle, then maybe you should reconsider what your deal breakers are. Unless you have the same allergies, then you won’t need to worry about the possibility of ending the relationship.
All you can really do if you don’t have any of these allergies is to change your perspective on how these allergens make you feel about the person you are dating. By finding the positive in situations like these, you may find that your partner can learn to tolerate what you may one day become allergic to.
