Relationships are a lot of work. And when it gets to a point where things simply aren’t working anymore, most of us find it best to put an end to the relationship. However, what happens when you realize that breaking up was a mistake?
Often times breakups are final. You get to a point where you realize you are better off apart than together. But in cases where being together is better than being apart and you find that you want to work on rebuilding the love you had for each other, getting back together can seem harder than you might think. Although there is no set of rules or guidelines that can make getting back with your ex a surefire success, we can at least offer some tips that might help make the process easier.
In some cases getting your ex back is not going to be hard. There are times when you both realize that being apart is a mistake and you are better together than you are on your own. In this instances, the work that goes into getting together again is more about rebuilding what was lost that led to you breaking up to begin with.
Ways to Get Back With Your Ex
Understand Why You Broke Up to Begin With
Before you even start the process of getting back together with an ex, you have to understand what went wrong the first time around. You need to understand what caused the break up and figure out how you can both work together to fix whatever went wrong. This step requires a lot of introspection and tough questions being asked.
This can be a difficult step because it is not just about you, this is also about your ex. You need to see things from their perspective too. What went wrong that made it so that they wanted to leave you as well. Is there a way to find middle ground where you can make a new relationship work?
Find Solutions to Your Problems
Before you officially seal the deal and get back with your ex, you should work on solutions to the problems that you had together. Having a way to fix the things that went wrong the first time around will make all the difference this time. Knowing how to solve a problem before it happens might seem hard, but you know why you broke up, now it is time to resolve the issues.
Show Your Ex That You Are Serious About Making Things Work
Once you have been able to find solutions to the problems you had before, it is important to show your ex that you are committed to changing. You need to show your ex that they can trust you again and that together you can both be happy. Talk to them, explain what went wrong and how you plan to fix it. Apologize for your part in the breakup and make it clear that you are taking responsibility for your own actions and words.
Don’t Dwell on the Breakup or Trying to Get Back Together
The last thing you should be doing is dwelling on your breakup or even the plan to get back together with your ex. Instead, keep yourself busy. Even if it is doing things you haven’t done before, staying active is important. You don’t want to find yourself depressed over the breakup and falling into a hole of sadness and despair that seems impossible to come out of. Whether you are single or back together, you need to be able to make yourself happy. Your partner is not the source of your happiness. Instead, they help contribute to the happiness and good feelings.
Be Ready to Change
In life, change is inevitable. But when it comes to getting back with an ex it is even more important to be ready to change. Things obviously didn’t work the first time, so being ready and able to change is the key to getting back together and making a relationship work moving forward. It is all about being willing to change and show that you won’t do the same things you did before.
Don’t Make Your Ex Stand on an Imaginary Pedestal
Your ex is the same person they were before the breakup. That means there is no need to idolize them or make it seem as if they are on some imaginary pedestal. They aren’t perfect and neither are you. Find a way to work as a team and move passed the breakup. There is no need to dwell on the past, but you also shouldn’t be making your ex out to be more than they are.
Relationships take a lot of work and commitment and when you are going for a second chance there are always ways to improve your relationship as a whole. Don’t lose sight of who you are in your efforts to get back with your ex and remember that change and being happy are the only way that a revived relationship will even have a chance at surviving.